This week I lost my last living grandparent. Part of me is angry–angry at myself for not being able to see her before she passed, but I know that she was surrounded by all of her children (all 9 of them!) on her last days including countless great great great grandchildren. You see, my grandmother was 100 years old and she was lucid up until her last day when she fell asleep and didn’t wake up. As sad as our whole family is to have lost her, we know that she lived a long and full life and we are consoled by the idea that she is no longer trapped in a body that just wasn’t able to keep up with her sharp mind.You might think that it’s silly that I am here showing you a manicure after such a sad loss, but nail polish has always been an escape for me: it helps me stay focused, it calms me. When I saw a picture of my grandmother that I took many years ago, I was inspired by the pattern I saw on her dress for my Stamping Saturdays mani.
I started with two coats of OPI Umpires Come Out At Night (press sample) from the MLB Collection. This is a gorgeous and opaque blue that dries to a shiny finish.
I then used a pattern from Konad M61 and Konad’s special white polish for the flowery design.
That was my grandma. I was able to sneak in this picture since she always hated being photographed. She was never without her rebozo (a type of shawl/scarf hybrid) because she did not like to show her hair. She had the most amazing completely white hair that was so plentiful that she had a hard time managing it. I always loved seeing her brush her hair out before she covered it up. Thank you for all the stories you would tell me, the candies you would sneak into my hands and for being the woman who raised my mother to be a loving and compassionate mother in turn. I’ll miss you, abuelita.
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I’m so sorry for your loss. It’s not silly at all to be posting. It’s a welcome and brief distraction from thinking about and feeling the loss. It’s a really cute mani 🙂
Thank you, Kathie.
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I too am sorry for your loss. I don’t think it’s silly to be painting your nails or posting. Everyone grieves in their own way and no one should judge how another person handles their grief. I loved reading your thoughts about your abuela and the manicure suits your sentiment. Take care of yourself.
A very sweet, appropriate tribute, I think. I remember losing my grandmother and being surprised at how sad I was. I’m glad you have such nice memories to carry with you.
I’m sorry to hear about your Grandma – I think it’s great that you paid a little tribute to her with today’s post.
Gorgeous nails as always!
Mary. <3
So sorry for your loss. Lovely tribute.
I am so sorry for your loss. But what an incredible & beautiful tribute to her.
*hugs* I’m sorry for your loss, I think it’s lovely you did this mani in honour of her.
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Love and hugs. It’s a beautiful manicure and a beautiful post x
The white floral stamping pops off the blue here so much!
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That is such an abuelita dress, it looks like the ones I remember my great aunts in Puerto Rico wearing. This is a nice tribute I think. And one of my standout memories of my grandmother on the other side of my family is watching her do her hair too, although she always wore hers in a bun at the base of her skull.
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Oh I’m so sorry to hear about your loss Cynthia. What an amazing life your grandmother must have lived – 100 years, 9 children, tons of grandchildren and great-grandchildren! Sending special thoughts your way…
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I am so very sorry for your loss. You grandmother sounds to have been a wonderful, inspiration woman and I know she would love your beautiful mani that is truly a tribute to her.
Cynthia, sorry for your grandmother’s passing. She lives on with you carrying her memory and shaping not only your mom’s life but yours as well.
Beautiful mani, just as always.
Such a beautiful post and a beautiful mani to go with it.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I lost my very, very dear grandpa this Summer and I’m still working on accepting the fact that he’s not here anymore.
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I’m sorry for your loss, I love the picture and sentiments you shared of her.
i am so sorry for your loss. what a sweet post and amazing woman
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I’m so sorry for your loss. I would (and that day will come) do nails, too. Hugs <3
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I’m so sorry for your loss. That thought about being silly didn’t even cross my mind when I got down to the pics. I thought WOW. How does she always get her nails to be THAT amazing?! I wanted to eat them and then buy a pair of patent navy blue shoes, that’s how good it looked. Yes, I just said Eat. They look that amazing. Probably like a magic blueberry slurry sauce.
I have one living grandma. The other pair died before I was born. I lost my sister 4 years ago to cancer. She was 29 and I was 31. My grandma was diagnosed with Alzheimers in 07, after my Grandpa died. Those 2 grandparents are the only ones I know, and I was really close to them growing up, despite that they were in their 60s/70s when I was small. Because of my sister’s traumatic death (she came home hospice and finally her body just stopped, but she basically rotted away and it took a month), it really affects me when I see my Grandma.
I know that sounds horrible. But all I can think of is death, loss, hurt, and pain. She doesn’t want to live really. I wouldn’t say she’s depressed, but she says she misses my Grandpa and she is “ready for the Lord to come take her anytime”. It’s really sad. She likes to play cards and Skipbo, and she has to have 24/7 supervision. One of her kids lives next door, and one live in Tenn. She has 7 altogether (and i believe 2 that miscarried or died at/just before birth?), my Dad was the last boy #6. Her oldest is in his 70s and my aunt was just diagnosed with cancer. I decided over the weekend to get over what I was feeling about my sister/death, and just go over there. She lives 5 minutes away, and my Dad spends the nights over there on Friday and gets up and makes biscuits and gravy for breakfast. Since my Grandpa and my sister’s deaths, it has been weird with some of the members of my family, and I like to avoid people, so I have been using that excuse. When I was little, it wasn’t unusual for everybody to show up on a random Sunday without planning it. I adored my Grandma. She taught me to sew and about gardening and about everything.
I’m not sure why I just wrote you this, but I guess I know how you feel. Even though you weren’t with her, she knows you care and that you love her. My Grandma has said as long as I can remember that she would like to pass in her sleep. To go to sleep and not wake up, so that reminded me of what happened with yours. If it means anything, that is how my Grandma wishes to go. I have so much respect and love for my Grandma. It sounds to me, that your grandma had a peaceful end of this life (I believe in some kind of afterlife), and that she was special enough to go that way. (sorry if my beliefs bother you. I hate to say something that may be offensive. When my sister passed, people said really dumb things, and I had to think that they mean well. So since we don’t’ know each other personally, I want to reach out, but I’m also nervous because I don’t want to make you feel worse).
I LOVE that you used a dress pattern for your nails. That is one of the most thoughtful things I have ever heard of. It made me tear up. It sucks that we are getting older. I don’t want to say any of the cliches, because I have heard them all, and they don’t really help. The only thing that really does is just a hug. If I met you somewhere, I would just give you a big hug.
And please don’t feel it’s silly what you posted afterwards. You painted your nails, the prettiest that I have seen in a very long time (I mean out of everyone in the world). For some reason I added a bunch of nail polish blogs on my IG, so I see a lot of them!!! (it must have been for a giveaway).
You and your fam are in my thoughts and prayers. Sorry this comment was so long! If you ever need to chat to get it off your chest, feel free to email me.
-karrie
ksmith8@emich.edu
Karrie–Thank you so much for such a beautiful comment and for sharing so much with me. Sometimes I wish I could hug people through here! 🙂
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I am so sorry for your loss. Nothing is sill about expressing your feelings through nails. It turned out to be quite a beautiful manicure!Thank you for sharing. I did something for my grandmother when it was her death anniversary. It was comforting to me it would’ve been something she liked. She also liked to paint her nails. I wish we would’ve shared that hobby before she passed but I know she’s watching me all the time now. 🙂
This post made me tear up. Beautiful and that includes the mani
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Your post completely made me tear up. This is a beautiful way to honor your abuelita.
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This is such a beautiful post. I was crying when I read it in L.A. and am crying reading it again now. I am sorry for your loss and think this is an outstanding tribute.