Quelle Monstruosité!

What do you do when you’re bored? Do you read? Watch TV? Read nail polish blogs (maybe that’s just me)? Well, I do all three of those AND I start doing crazy things with my nails. I was watching American Idol (yawnfest) and I started playing with my nail polishes. I am going to do my sister-in-law’s nails for a St. Patrick’s Day party that she is going to so I took out all of my green polishes to get ready. I am going to use one of my image plates that has a shamrock on it and stamp it white on top of a green base and maybe add some glitter. Who knows?

After I got all my stuff together I thought that I would play around with some of my rhinestones so I took out a few colors. I wanted to use CG Gothic Lolita from their recent Electropop Collection. Now, if you know anything at all about me, it’s that I love purple. PURPLE EVERYTHING. At one point I had purple curtains. (I only kept them for a week because I realized how ridiculous my room looked…especially since I’m 32!!!! And it wasn’t a mature purple…it was crazy Barney purple.) So it started out with such a beautiful purple. Oh, Gothic Lolita:  Gothic Lolita, light of my life, fire of my loins. My sin, my soul. Gothic Lo-lee-ta: the tip of the tongue taking a trip of three steps down the palate to tap, at three, on the teeth.  Gothic Lo. Lee. Ta.

I’m pretty sure that Nabokov is turning over in his grave right now. How dare I blaspheme his work by using it to wax poetic about nail polish? Well, nail polish can be art too so back off lit snobs. But just look at this purple:

 

So how did that beautiful purple become this:

 

 

Yes, my dear readers, this is the kind of stuff that nightmares are made of.  I can’t even call this ghetto fabulous…it’s just so foul. I have removed this monstrosity and promise to never do this again.

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6 thoughts on “Quelle Monstruosité!

  1. Oh my gosh… that was the funniest post I've ever read!!! And- FYI it hurt my stomach so bad to laugh so THANKS A LOT! haha. Seriously though that was funny as hell. I love the cartoon. Those nails are… different! Very well done but the color and styling is… well… just as you described. I love seeing nail fails. In fact, I think I'm going to re-blog this, so if you're vehemently opposed to that, please let me know asap. Man… I love this post. Great job.

      1. I thought it was only fitting that I just add to this comment thread. What did you do to your nails you crazy bitch??!! Hahahaha! That’s still just as funny now and my stomachs doesn’t even hurt now! Yay! I think the most shocking part about these nails is how the yellow makes them look like those awful duck nails. Maybe you started the trend!! Shame on you. ;p

  2. Oh my gosh… that was the funniest post I’ve ever read!!! And- FYI it hurt my stomach so bad to laugh so THANKS A LOT! haha. Seriously though that was funny as hell. I love the cartoon. Those nails are… different! Very well done but the color and styling is… well… just as you described. I love seeing nail fails. In fact, I think I’m going to re-blog this, so if you’re vehemently opposed to that, please let me know asap. Man… I love this post. Great job.

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